Let's Talk About... Happiness...

Let's talk about happiness, shall we?

Are you happy? Right now?

I hope you are, because, chances are, if you aren't happy right now, it may be difficult for you to ever be happy.

Why?

Sadly, many people base their idea of happiness on a "When/Then" happiness.

Have you ever heard, or said, or thought, these things?

"I'll be happy WHEN I make $100,000 a year. THEN I'll be happy." 

"I'll be happy WHEN I live in a 4 bedroom house. THEN I'll be happy."

"I'll be happy WHEN I graduate from college. THEN I'll be happy."

"I'll be happy WHEN I'm no longer sick. THEN I'll be happy."

I'm sure we could all add our own examples. We've heard them. We've said them. We've thought them.

Here's the problem with When/Then happiness. It never comes. There's always another step to go. 

When you make $100,00 a year, you'll be happy WHEN you make $200,000. THEN you'll be happy. 

When you graduate from college, you'll be happy WHEN you earn your Master's. THEN you'll be 

happy. We're always raising the bar, and never jumping over it. 

When/Then happiness just doesn't cut the mustard.

WHEN is the time to be happy? The time to be happy is right now! The time to be happy is right 

now, regardless of your situation! 

I know someone, who shall remain nameless (because I'm nice like that...) who truly believes that 

70% of her life has been "hell". Maybe it was. Maybe it wasn't. But she perceives it that way, and 

because she perceives it that way, it affects everything she does now. It affects the way she thinks. It 

affects the way she speaks. It affects everything, really. It results in When/Then happiness, which is 

no happiness at all.
I was in a social situation a few nights ago, and was speaking with a woman who works in social 

services. In the course of the conversation, I learned that she once lived in a coastal Oregon town. It 

clicked for me, at that moment. I asked, "Did you once work for a woman's center in that town?" She 

answered, "Yes, I did." I said, "I think you rejected me for the Executive Director position in around 

1997 or so..." She looked at me, and answered, "I remember that! What a small world!" It turns out 

we'll probably be good friends, in spite of that...

But I thought about my life at that time. I was living in a borrowed, very small "floathouse", literally

 a small house built on logs floating in the water. My entire income was a $101 per month disability 

pension. My days were spent picking up cans to help "make the ends meet." But... I was happy. I was

 happy, because, as Abraham Lincoln supposedly said, "Most people are just about as happy as they 

choose to be." (But, like George Washington said, "Don't believe everything you read on the 

Internet.") 

I chose to be happy. That doesn't make me some kind of super spiritual guru. It just means I learned 

a lesson, and decided it was a good one. I decided that happiness is NOW, not When/Then.

Please don't settle for When/Then happiness. It's a trap. It's a mirage. It's a lie. Consider choosing to 

be happy NOW, regardless of your situation. Don't learn the sad lesson that, if you can't choose to be 

happy NOW, it may be difficult for you to be happy LATER. After all, now is better than never, isn't 

it? 

Peace be upon you......